January 21, 2023
[00:00:00] Kris: Hello, and welcome to the Design and Prosper podcast. This is Episode 63 and we are chatting about how to smash imposter syndrome. Yeah, Let’s smash it.
[00:00:11] Donna: Let’s do it.
Okay. Okay. It is not you. In fact, we believe everyone has it, or at least every creative human being has it. It’s, it’s absolutely nature. Essentially everyone feels vulnerable and a little bit like a fraud, especially when we are elevating. And especially when you’re trying something new, it’s like, it’s your, it’s your very first time.
And I think we’ve talked about Brene Brown’s FFTs before. we always refer to those, which is. Um, how can we say this? Well, we’ll just say it’s an effing first time or fabulous first time or a freaking first time, whatever you like, whatever you’d like to pop in there as the adjective you would like to add at the beginning of that FFT, that something first time. It’s big it’s
it’s because done it before.
It’s Yeah,
[00:01:14] Kris: And it might not feel fabulous. So maybe
fabulous. Isn’t the right word, but that’s the whole point. It doesn’t actually feel good when you’re doing something for the first time often, and especially when you’re elevating and you’re growing and you’re going to the next level. It doesn’t always feel good.
So when we reach new levels of success or achievement, there’s this old saying new level, new devil, we love what Denise Duffield Thomas says. She says it’s a new level, same devil,
because it’s like, this stuff keeps coming back, on repeat, even though you’ve reached a certain level, like, oh wow.
I got my first like $2,000 project. Oh, wow. I got my first $5,000 project. The same limiting beliefs start creeping in no matter where you’re at, it’s like, it’ll happen when you hit that $20,000 project or whatever it is. It’s like, oh my goodness. Like
[00:02:11] Donna: that same devil.
[00:02:13] Kris: yeah. That voice in your head. That mean
voice, know, and it’s saying like, are you crazy? Really? Who are you who are you to do this?
[00:02:22] Donna: Yeah, that’s right Yeah like who are you to be running a design business and you, you know, you’re not creative enough. You’re not clever enough. There are all, there are so many not enoughs that
can list here.
Aren’t Kris
[00:02:34] Kris: yeah. You don’t have enough experience.
You’re so ordinary you’re boring. Clients are gonna see right through you, you know, the list goes on and on.
[00:02:44] Donna: They’ll see that you’re a fraud, you know, and I’m fully exposed here.
[00:02:49] Kris: Mm.
[00:02:50] Donna: gonna be humiliated and fail you know, your business is essentially gonna go bust
[00:02:56] Kris: Yeah.
[00:02:56] Donna: you just haven’t got what it takes. All of those mean sort of attacks on self happen, especially when we elevate. And it’s really fascinating to Kris and I, this is always when our beautiful academy people or one-to-one clients, start to elevate, they start to grow, they start to flourish. then all of a sudden they have attack of imposter syndrome and, you know, they really, the self doubt creeps in and, you know, it’s just, it’s, it’s really sad that we have to be really vigilant with imposter syndrome.
There’s no quick fix. There’s no, like. Magic something that can happen to make it disappear. You’ve gotta keep an eye out for it every step of the way in your business, because it’s gonna rear it’s like ugly little head and you’ve gotta smash it
every single time and just make sure that you are really careful about when it shows itself.
and show itself in so many different
ways.
[00:03:53] Kris: And you’ve gotta see it for what it is. And usually what it is is the ego, the ego is emerging and the ego doesn’t like change. Even if it’s positive for you, it doesn’t like change. So it’s gonna start trying to knock you down so what we need to do is just call it what it is say I see you ego. I see what you’re trying to
do here. And once we bring that awareness to it, that’s how we can bust through the limiting beliefs.
[00:04:20] Donna: Remember there is no real cure for imposter syndrome other than like Kris is just saying that awareness to swipe it the minute it pops up. it’s likely to keep rearing it’s ugly head. Um, but this awareness that Kris was just speaking of.
Is everything. It’s understanding it and knowing, knowing it in all its forms, in all of the saboteur forms that it can take and saying, right. I’ve got you. And I don’t need you right now. And thanks very much. But exit stage left.
[00:04:50] Kris: When you have limiting beliefs that are underpinning the way that you’re showing up. Um, you know, it could be a feeling of not enoughness. a Not feeling like you are where you wanna be in business. Like it’s taking too long. I’m just, I’m hopeless because like it’s taken this person half the time it’s taken me or, you know, that goes back into comparison again. Things like my ideas aren’t strong enough. They’re not clever enough.
I’m not smart enough. I’m not good enough at business. I’m not good enough at coming up with concepts, whatever it may be. and also this imposter syndrome can show up in business in sneaky ways as well.
[00:05:30] Donna: Mm. Yeah. What we’d like to do is ask you to really understand. And start to pay attention and maybe make a note of what is your limiting belief? Like kris gave whole heap of examples. Just then sit down and think about what yours is, so that you are on the ready the very next time it pops up in your business. So remember the awareness is key and understanding where it’s gonna pop up. So maybe take some time out to really think about, well, what is my limiting belief? What is it? So that then I can annihilate it out of the way that I’m thinking out of my business processes. Out of my elevation, I’m gonna get rid of this thing
[00:06:11] Kris: Hmm. And it could be showing up in a funny way as well. You might not even be consciously aware of it at this point. So it could be showing up in a way like you’re charging too low and you’re doing it consistently. Um, you might not be communicating your value to your clients. You might be sort of hiding. Your light or you, might not be fully communicating all that you can bring to the table. You might not be fully showing up on socials or in terms of marketing yourself because you know, you’re, you’re scared of shining the light
[00:06:42] Donna: Hmm.
[00:06:42] Kris: on you and your business.
[00:06:44] Donna: like who am I to say that I can create such an amazing transformation for your business?
You know, I better not say that I can do that. I better just keep quiet about that. And I won’t really talk about the value that I’m gonna bring and that, and the transformation that I’m gonna provide.
we sort of keep that really quiet and we keep that to ourselves. Well that there is imposter syndrome, that there is a sabotage in your business. it’s other things it’s like, clients will not be respecting you or appreciate your value. that’s evidence of imposter syndromes showing up
Clients are not trusting your advice or, you feel like they’re not trusting your advice.
You feel like they’re constantly wanting to make changes. And so that’s them perpetuating your imposter syndrome because, oh, the clients always doing this to me, the client’s always wanting to make changes. They don’t trust me
[00:07:36] Kris: mm.
[00:07:37] Donna: there is imposter syndrome. We can take the reins back when that starts to happen.
We can take the reins back on this. We’ve got some fabulous scripts in our nicely said client script kit that is available in our shop right now to help you smash through some of those client conversations that can be really impacting and, really, um, keeping you set in imposter syndrome, keeping you in that mindset. Entrenched. It’s keeping you there. So we, we want you to bust out and really sort of recognize when those sneaky things pop up.
[00:08:11] Kris: Yeah, it can impact every single aspect of your business. It will infiltrate. It’s a, it’s like a little sneaky infiltrator and your sense of not good enoughness can show up, like in all those ways that we’re talking about.
[00:08:25] Donna: Absolutely. So what happens is, it compounds. So we’ll have all that going on. We’ll have this not enoughness floating around in the back of our mind or in the front of our mind, right front and center and we think, okay. So in order to break through this not enoughness, in order to break through this imposter syndrome, you feel like, okay.
I wanna be a legit graphic designer pro so I must need, you know, really high academic qualifications, the best that I can get. I need a bigger team. I need more years in business, I need better connections, upgraded design skills, a fancy studio space, a wider range of services. All these more, more, more, I need
[00:09:09] Kris: Hmm.
[00:09:09] Donna: bigger better, but no, no. And no is the answer to that. It’s none of those things. Absolutely. it’s none of those things.
[00:09:18] Kris: no, you could be waiting around for years for all those things to fall into place. You can have all those beautiful things like the client respect and the trust and feeling good about your solutions without any of those things. they are myths really, because you’re never gonna be good enough in the eyes of your ego.
You know, you’re always gonna have to have more skills, and the bigger studio and the, you know, bigger clients and all those things that Donna mentioned. So it’s like, no, that’s actually really not it. It’s none of those, none of those
[00:09:51] Donna: Yeah, Nope. Nope. Nope. So this is what you really need to do. Firstly, show up anyway. That’s what we want you to do to show up, regardless of how you’re feeling, regardless of that ego tapping you on the shoulder and the mean voices happening, show up, get your bottom in that seat, which is what we’re chatting about in the last podcast.
[00:10:11] Kris: Yes, because you’re not alone in this. There are many high level achievers out there in the world who feel exactly the same. It is so common. It’s not going to go away. But the difference is between the successful people and the people who actually get somewhere is they show up anyway, that is the key.
[00:10:32] Donna: Like for example, Marie Forleo who we mention a lot on this podcast, because we just love her. We have so many aligned values and thoughts and approach to business. She’s a really highly revered business coach in the world, she’s worldwide international. She’s known across the globe for her business savvy, her business success.
She’s uber successful. She has a multi seven figure business. And she’s a person that certainly inspires us. she inspires so many people and she has imposter syndrome. She confessed just recently. She has imposter syndrome. You know, of all the people she comes across so confidently she shows up all the time and she shows up for us, for the people that she’s inspiring. And she was saying that after talking to other high level achievers, she realised it’s so common, that it’s time just to accept that it’s not going away. It’s like Kris was just saying it’s absolutely time to accept that it’s going to be there. There’s no cure, but the good news. There is high level awareness. So with high level awareness, when it does show up, we can get rid of it fairly quickly. We don’t have to have it lingering on and dragging us down. That awareness is everything.
[00:11:53] Kris: Mm. And it’s about doing the thing. Doing the thing even when you have imposter syndrome, it’s like that old book, feel the fear and do it, anyway. It’s like have the imposter syndrome and do it anyway. Because we’re not gonna say to you, oh, it’s gonna go away because it’s like fear, fear doesn’t really go away.
Some things can feel easier with practice. And once we, show up and get into a, a practice of it, naturally, things are gonna feel easier. But like we said before, new level, new devil or same devil, and you’re going to be facing those kind of weird limiting beliefs no matter which level that you’re at. So whether you’ve got an audience of a hundred people, or you’ve got an audience of hundreds of thousands of people, this is what’s gonna happen. You’re gonna start to feel that limiting belief step in, but you just need to do the thing anyway, and just know that you’ve got this. You’ve gotta have that unshakeable belief deep down, acknowledge that everyone feels this way. It’s a feeling of resistance that pops up when we’re going through a growth phase, resistance will be there.
[00:13:05] Donna: Absolutely. It will be there and it would be odd not to be there. Wouldn’t it,
[00:13:10] Kris: Mm,
[00:13:11] Donna: it has to be there in order for you to really notice and understand that you really care about this thing.
[00:13:18] Kris: Mm,
[00:13:19] Donna: So in other words, if you are feeling massive resistance, it’s a really good sign and it would be really weird if you didn’t feel that resistance to us, feeling that resistance and, and, and understanding the importance of the project really means that you care means that you are in this for the right reason. So we love that. We love that it’s there and it’s evidence that we care and that we want this thing to work for ourselves or for our client.
[00:13:47] Kris: Yeah. If it’s a big enough dream for you, you, you are going to feel the intensity of it. It’s gonna feel big. And the it’s a kind of paradox because we are always saying, you know, go with the path of least resistance, go with what feels good. So it’s a funny thing because you think, well, should I be feeling resistance? If this is a good thing for me? Shouldn’t it feel like the path of least resistance?
Yes and no. So when we, when we start and get an idea often, that feels like, oh, you know, you just feel it you feel the goosebumps and all that sort of thing. Once we start getting into it. And we have to actually take the action and we are doing the day to day doing of that idea. That’s when the resistance can really set in because you know, the egos had a chance to, to worm its way in and generally.
The more resistance you feel with a project like that, the more important it is to your overall growth and development, like your, evolution of you as a person, even
[00:14:48] Donna: Absolutely.
[00:14:50] Kris: it’s part of your purpose being here. And honestly, if your purpose doesn’t feel a little bit challenging and like you are, you’re leveling up in some way. Then maybe it’s not really your purpose. So don’t worry if it does feel hard at times because it’s totally normal. And it’s what every successful person will tell you has happened to them without a doubt.
[00:15:18] Donna: absolutely it’s it really does that whatever it is that you’re going through is really important to you at that time. It’s that simple, it’s really important. Growth. And we’re all wanting to grow all the time in different ways with our businesses and personally, so listen out for that and really pay attention and, it’s actually beautiful Intel. Isn’t it? When the resistance is really loud with a really, you know, big capital R you go, okay, this is important to me. This is important. I wanna pay attention and I wanna move through it as quickly. And as as I can.
[00:15:55] Kris: whenever we’ve had resistance, Don, I know that this has happened for you as well. What we tend to do is go back to that initial moment of the idea and remember what that felt like, because the resistance can fool you , it can, and there can be massive resistance, but it can make you think, oh, this is too hard.
This is not meant to be like this. This is supposed to be really easy. But remember how you felt when that first. That, that you got that first inkling of the idea when it landed in your body and you had that full body reaction, you knew in your heart that it was what you needed to do. It was scary. It was a scary thought, but you knew you had to do it.
Try to go back to how you were feeling at that time. Because that’ll tell you the truth of the matter because we can get fatigued. We can get, um, definitely a sense of resistance as we are, leveling up and starting to achieve our goals. It is very normal.
[00:16:47] Donna: It’s so normal and and then fear creeps in and imposter syndrome creeps in. And if we let those drive us and be the driving force of our decision making, then we’ll miss really beautiful opportunities because we think, oh, it’s all too hard. It’s meant to be easy. It’s not easy. It’s all too hard. So we’ve gotta keep it in check.
We’ve gotta go. Okay. This is actually fear. This is actually imposter syndrome and I’m still gonna move forward with this. So it’s really, really important to have that awareness. Like we were saying at the beginning of the poddy. If you have awareness, you can recognize these saboteurs really, really quickly. then, like we said, they’re never going away, but they’ll always be popping up their little heads, like the hungry hippo game. they just keep popping up,
[00:17:34] Kris: yep.
[00:17:35] Donna: and you’ve gotta be ready to go. Stop, stop. Stop. No, no, no. I’m, I’m on top of this. So I love that advice, Kris, about going back to that initial moment, when that beautiful idea or beautiful conceptual thought landed and you had all the feels. When you knew it was right it’s going to be right. And okay. Execution time, don’t let the muddy path of execution sort of push you aside and push that great idea aside and make, you feel like it’s not possible.
[00:18:04] Kris: Yeah. So we’re all about inspired action, but we can guarantee you, there will be resistance along that pathway, especially if it is important to you. So that’s it. It’s like I see you resistance. I see you imposter syndrome. That clarity, that awareness is key. And some other things that can help are getting a support system in place.
[00:18:25] Donna: Yes, a beautiful support system as solo preneurs, we often feel so isolated and so alone, but you don’t have to be, you can get us on board as your coaches. We can do one-to-one coaching or join the academy. We would love to help you in the academy. We have a wait list at the moment and doors will open again in February next year, 2023. So that’s one beautiful way to make sure all of what we’ve been talking about today is kept in check.
[00:18:56] Kris: Mm. And the other thing that’s really helpful. And we talk about it all the time is systems. Having the amazing support network of systems that will help you feel more confident in the concepts that you’re delivering, feel more confident in how you are delivering the solution to your clients.
Feel more confident in how you’re handling your clients. Feel more confident in the whole customer experience process. Systems underpin everything. It could be things like your marketing strategy. You need a system for all these things. It could be like your sales system, your, briefing process. .All of these things are gonna help you squash down that voice of the imposter syndrome of the ego of resistance when you have supports in place like that.
[00:19:45] Donna: Yeah.
[00:19:45] Kris: We’re here to help you. We could go on and on with this list of stuff that you need, but we are here. We are here to help you. We can help you fill in the missing pieces of the puzzle. So that you don’t feel like you’ve got these gaps that are making you feel less confident than you need to.
[00:20:01] Donna: Absolutely, we would love to help you. It’s not too late to work with us.
One to one. We have places open to work with you. One to one where you can get both of our brains on your business to look at all of those beautiful systems that Kris was saying, because so many of our one-to-one clients and our academy clients have said to us, imposter syndrome is on their list. Help me. Help this to disappear. Now, as we’ve said, there’s no cure, but looking at your business model, looking at all of these beautiful systems that underpin your entire ecosystem for your business helps you to gain the confidence you need and really keeps imposter syndrome at bay. So, we’re not gonna say the resistance is not there because there’s a lot of leveling up when you work with us.
We will have our coaching hats firmly on, but it will help you to really make sure that that confidence is soaring and that you are feeling 100% in it everytime that you present yourself with, whether it be presenting yourself with a beautiful proposal, presenting yourself with a beautiful design solution, presenting yourself in your socials, in your messaging. You will have that confidence because the beautiful systems will underpin all of that.
[00:21:13] Kris: Yes, we’re here to support you. You do not have to be alone in this. So if you wanna talk to us about options, send us a DM in Instagram. You can reach out to us via our form on our website as well. If you wanna go the easy path, just DM us the word help, and we will do the rest. We will help you find your way.
So we would love to hear from you. And if you have any thoughts or anything, that’s come up for you about this podcast episode, let us know, reach out to us, let us know. What is your biggest limiting belief that keeps coming up for you? What is the big, bad monster that, uh, imposter syndrome monster that keeps knocking on your door? What is it for you? So let us know.
[00:21:57] Donna: Yeah, absolutely.
[00:21:59] Kris: If you bring something out to the light and that can be sharing it with somebody else like us, that can be a first step in minimizing its impact in your life. So shine a light on it. Share it. And that will be the first step.
[00:22:14] Donna: Absolutely that first step of awareness, like we were saying, awareness is the beginning of the understanding
[00:22:20] Kris: Hmm.
[00:22:21] Donna: and being able to contain this thing. So if you shine a line on it, not only will you be aware, but whoever you tell will be aware. It’s really getting a role on that awareness. We love that.
[00:22:32] Kris: Hmm.
[00:22:33] Donna: Hopefully we have given you some beautiful strategies around kicking imposter syndrome to the curb, really understanding how you can get a handle on it. And hopefully, you know that we are here for you and we are waiting to help you with open arms. So, um, reach out if you need us.
[00:22:49] Kris: Yes. All right. That’s it for this episode, have a beautiful rest of your day. And we’ll connect soon. Bye.
[00:22:56] Donna: bye everyone.
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